Peter Piper?

I wish you all had been here to hear the audible of this conversation Brett and I just had....went a little something like this.

Me: "Do you like the name Piper?"
Brett: "Huh?"
Me: "Piper. Do you like it?"
Brett: "What kind? What about paper?"
Me: "No. Piiiiper"
Brett: "Yeah WHAT about it"
Me: "Do I have an accent? I'm saying P-I-P-E-R"
Brett: "hahahahahah-hahahaha you say that like you now say PAPER! I just now assume you say everything with an accent! And, Piper? What Piper Rogers? Is he some kind of fighter pilot?? That's only a name for a fighter pilot."
Me: "What? I have that big of an accent? And it'd be a girl's name"
Brett: "Heck no, paper, piper, whatever the heck you're saying is not a girl. John Piper! He's a guy! Peter Piper picking a peck of pickled peppers! He's a guy!"
Me: "I can't even reply to those reasons....hahahaha you're ridiculous."
Brett: "I'm not naming my kid PAPER"

And there you have it. I might have an accent. We might never have kids because we can't even speak potential children's names. Brett wants a fighter pilot as a child. But he doesn't want an evangelist/ author or apparently a pepper picker either. The end.